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2003-03-15 - 9:53 p.m. WANTED: One very good liar. Male. With free Friday and Saturday nights, for the purpose of movies and Walmart runs and general Craptown merriment. Guitarist arms and melty puppy dog eyes a plus. Applicant must love music, and especially must tolerate the flute. Special consideration will be given to applicants who are musicians themselves. Playing the guitar itself is not necessary. Applicant is asked to be good at lying for these purposes: telling employer that "everything is going to be okay", at least on a weekly, if not daily basis, and also for the employer to hear that she is "not boring", and therefore is worthy of company. Employer is also not adverse to hearing that she is beautiful every once in a while, if only for a good laugh. Employer has never tried pina coladas, but does not mind getting caught out in the rain. Pay rate is negotiable upon reviewing the winning applicant's talent, and lying experience. Pay will certainly include baked goods, impromptu flute concerts, and sweet, goofy grins. Employer does not expect the world. Employer no longer believes in "living happily ever after". Employer merely wants the chance to live happily in some series of "nows", and perhaps to have these series of "nows" become strung together into a "while". Liar applications being accepted as soon as possible. With no pressure. No deadlines. Just optimism. ***************** Maybe I just watched "Gone with the Wind". How stupid is Scarlett O'Hara? Through her own stupidity, she let the one man who really loved her walk off into the Georgia fog. If anybody really loved me I don't think I could do that. Because anybody with enough dogged tenacity that it apparently takes to get through my painfully shy exterior has to be inherently lovable on my part. I also just listened to Jeff Buckley's "Grace", finally. I don't think there's anything I should, or could, possibly say about Jeff Buckley. At any rate, I think therein lies the two main reasons why I am feeling suddenly... lacking? Now I'm off to make some iced tea, play the "Carmen" Fantasy on my sorely neglected flute, and just generally moon about. No, no, no. Not "moon" in the sense that you're thinking of. Dirrty-minded eejits. It's warm out, but it's not that warm. It has to hit at least 80 for public nudity, in my humble opinion. ;) 
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