So wotthehell are you doing reading this drivel? Get thee to a movie theater posthaste, buy thee some Twizzlers and a slushie if you desire, and go see "The Matrix: Reloaded", because Sweet Holy Mofo Jeebus H. X-mas, yeah. Damn.

Just, yeah.

Go on, go!

Anyway, on the bus coming back from good mall today, I saw a groundhog. Not exactly right in the middle of downtown Bumblefuck, but still, close enough to seem a bit out of place.

I am very mad at my ridiculously cute platform flip-flops. They have given me a very painful blister on the top of each foot. Note to self: do not wear cute shoes anywhere other than.... well, just do not wear cute shoes. Yes. "Putain de merde." Hehehehehehe.

Dammit, just go see that movie.

So there is this lunar eclipse tonight. Naturally, it is cloudy. Oh well.

I think my powers of telekinesis are broken. Ok. They're really non-existent. Concentrating on things and making them come to you (or go away from you) would be such a nice skill to have.

Vanilla Coke.... to this coaster in front of me.... NOW!

Dubya...... to Pluto...... NOW!

Graduate school diploma.... to the pile of junk where resides my undergraduate diploma..... NOW!

Hehe. And on and on until what I'm really trying to say magically happens.

Yup.

**************

And now, yet another nifty survey, this time borrowed from Michaela:

I AM NOT: perfect.

I WAS: the illusion of perfect.

I WAS NEVER: perfect.

I WILL BE: in bed, hopefully, by 12:30.

I WILL: *deep breath* GET THE HELL TO GRAD SCHOOL THIS AUGUST. Please, encouraging ass-kickings always welcome.

I WILL NOT: be forced to spend an unnecessary $5 on a cab to werk tomorrow morning, because dammit I will leave my house early enough to walk downtown so I have that much longer to yell at the mofo bus driver for skipping stops on his route. BUS ROUTES ARE SET IN STONE. MOSES BROUGHT THEM DOWN FROM MT. ARARAT WITH THE TEN COMMANDMENTS, PEOPLE.

I LIKE: vanilla Coke. :)

I LOVE: music, and those who make it.

I DISLIKE: brussels sprouts.

I HATE: stupid people, 95% of whom have shopped in Shoetopia at some point in the last three months. I am dead serious.

I WANT: to have telekinetic powers. Really.

I NEED: the motivation and the courage to get my ass out of here and get to grad school in August where I belong.

I DONT WANT: any more stupid spam e-mails!

I DONT NEED: to be here anymore.

I SHOULDN'T: spend as much money (on CDs, mostly) as I do, but music has become so like a drug for me. It helps with all the... emptiness?

I'D LIKE TO HAVE: a bit more confidence.

I'D LIKE TO OWN: a Powell Handmade Conservatory Model Aurumite flute.

I LISTEN: to music until my ears bleed. I listen to people too, if they ever decide to talk to me (or remember I exist).

I EAT: lunch at 2:00 when I'm at werk, thankyouverymuch.

I DRINK: alone, mostly. Are you really that surprised?

I SMOKE: nothing. Ever.

I DRESS: the way I feel like it.

I LAUGH: sometimes. Not nearly often enough.

I DRIVE: nothing. :-P

I PLAY: flute, piccolo, and (fake) piano, just a bit.

I CRY: at geek movies and otherwise when the need presents itself.

I YELL: at the cat when she chews on my blanket and knocks the not-so-carefully placed mixture of garbage and important stuff I should have looked at three months ago off of my desk.

I DREAM:ed a dream in time gone by, when hope was high and life worth living.....

I FEEL: itchy.

I MAKE: Spanish rice to die for and cookies that are the manna of the gods, when I'm feeling motivated. Also, once in a while I'll make a happy tape. :)

I SAY: little.

I WISH I COULD: take a time machine back to a year ago today so I can kick myself. For two major reasons.

I WISH I WAS: somewhere else.

I WISH I WASN'T: so quiet and boring.

I WISH I KNEW: how to use those damn foot measuring things at werk.

I AM HAPPY: sometimes. This week, most of the time. :)

I AM LONELY: almost always. :(

I AM SAD: sometimes.

I AM MAD: at myself.

I AM DEPRESSED: off and on.

I LOVE MYSELF: only when I'm on a stage with my flute. Then the outside world ceases to exist and music is the only thing that will ever matter.

I HATE MYSELF: when I'm drinking. Heh. Do you see why I drink alone?

I WANT TO ______ RIGHT NOW: see someone

I WANT TO ______ TOMORROW: see someone

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