*taps fingers on desk*

Well, here's a few random thoughts anyway:

-The Stupid Social Security Administration sent me a card with the wrong middle initial. Two sources have told me it's somewhat illegal for me to actually use the card. So I'm thinking about changing my middle name to Valentine, just so I don't have to go and get ANOTHER new card. Did you think I was going to actually tell you what my middle name is? No way. My middle name is the source of all my powers. That and the weirdness of my toes. The government is going to send in a SWAT team to rip up my birth certificate and break my toes now I'd expect.

-My cat does not like it when I sneeze. In fact, my sneezing causes her to run away like she was being pursued by all the demons in hell. Strangely enough, she does that also when I play piccolo. I can't imagine why. Piccolo is only the world's greatest instrument (besides flute of course). I strongly believe that the beautiful, high-pitched tone of the piccolo is the voice of angels in heaven. The angels float around happily, with piccolos in the pockets of their white dresses (Band geek joke #312798798753: "Hey baby, is that a piccolo in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"). When they run into other angels, they whip out their piccolos and chirp happily to one another through the gorgeous sounds of the most perfect instrument on earth or in heaven.

-I should have stopped talking about the piccolo quite a while ago, huh?

-Should I seriously quit Sears, or am I just destined to hate every "day job"- so should I suck it up and deal?

-My new goal is to bake a HOMEMADE key lime pie. If you crave something for four months nonstop, you've got to make it yourself. I've never actually baked a pie before. But I think I'm turning Betty Crocker-ish in my old age. Most key lime pies aren't actually green, sometimes they just add green food coloring. Green is my favorite color, but here's hoping my pie will not be green accidently.

-I am a dork. Just thought I'd share in case you'd forgotten that at any point throughout this wonderfully intelligent and cool piece of writing.

-Rum is expensive.

-I miss people. Hint, hint, anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

-On that note, I believe the perfect guy is probably a combination of the 80s teen movie heroes Ferris Bueller of "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" and Lloyd Dobler of "Say Anything".

-Through too many years of being a band geek, I've decided that football is much better to watch live. Because, in fact, through careful observation and good seats, resourceful flute players everywhere have come to the conclusion that football players do not wear underwear. If I am wrong and there are actually football players reading this, please sign my guestbook with your name and number. ;)

-Speaking of band geekism, there is a legend in my college band that at some point during the 80s, it was quite the fashion for guys to go completely commando underneath the uniform. Eww, and ouch. Luckily the university has since sprung for new uniforms.

-Sprung was not the right word to use just then.

-I have nothing else to say after that.

Well, I guess I'll put an end to my collosally loserlike evening and go to bed. Before I hurt myself, I think. :)

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