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turning my brown eyes gray, so gray, everything gray
2002-09-06 - 8:47 p.m.


I've been feeling gray and useless all day. I curled up in my bed and just wanted it all to go away.

*giant monster sigh*

I need a job. I could suck it up and go back to the grocery store. But I can't. Or won't! My bosses seemed more interested in learning my life story than letting me just do my job for much of the summer. Couldn't they just leave the gossip to their many regular customers?

I need to be in school right now. But I have no money. But no job with which to get money. And little motivation with which to get a job. Along those same lines, I need a new flute. Again the no money/no job/no motivation idea.

I need a trip to Denny's for pie.

I need it to be my birthday again. That was a wonderful day.

Most likely, I need a good swift kick in the ass. Life sucks and I'm a glutton for punishment. I know I keep saying these same old things over and over. But things just don't get any better. I don't get any less boring. I don't have anything wonderful to give anyone. I took one of those silly quizzes I'm so addicted to that was supposed to tell you your "soul type" and it said I have no soul. That's pretty much how I feel right now. Like a gray shadowy ghost of a person.

I wish I had a reason not to be so gloomy. One little reason...

Sorry to bother anyone actually reading this. I'm going to go back to bed now.

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